Lyrics Day Ninety One – ‘Snowball’

Hey everyone,

today’s lyrics share my experience of motivation, or I should say the key to motivation. I always put a lot of pressure on myself to be productive each day, but of course there are times when I feel a lack of motivation, and over time, with reading and life experience, I’ve realised that in order to be motivated, the first step is literally to stand, and do anything. In the lyrics, I speak about doing the washing up and how that helped me, but it can be anything. Then, the framework of your mind somehow changes – your posture, your intention, your movement, they all play a part and help motivation to grow, just from a small start.  As I read, ‘the key to motivation is motivation.’

The reason the lyrics are named ‘snowball’ is because it’s similar to that effect – initially, you have a very small flake of snow, but over time, more snow accumulates and the snowball is created – it gets larger and larger.

(I’ve had a very long day and I’m not sure I explained that properly, so if you have any questions, please feel free to comment!)

Stay safe ~

Sean

Snowball (Verse, Half Chorus, Verse, Chorus, Bridge, Chorus)

Feeling tired and lethargic
not an ounce of inclination
realised the ‘snowball effect’
was intrinsic to motivation

The first step is standing
it all begins with action
the intention to move
instigates a reaction

Started by doing something
decided on the washing up
as the bubbles worked their magic
I began to leave my ruck

 
The first step is standing
it all begins with action
the intention to move
instigates a reaction
That’s why even small tasks
can aid progress overall
because little by little
motivation begins to snowball

I realised then it didn’t matter
exactly what I did
as long as I didn’t remain
sincere, but somehow glib
with those gradual steps
I regained a sense of peace
my snowball became larger
piece by fluffy piece

The first step is standing
it all begins with action
the intention to move
instigates a reaction
That’s why even small tasks
can aid progress overall
because little by little
motivation begins to snowball

Lyrics Day Ninety – ‘Envy’

Hey everyone,

today’s lyrics concern the feeling of envy I experienced yesterday. I was just having some cereal on my day off, and scrolling through my phone, where I came across a photo of a girl I used to volunteer with, who is currently teaching in Korea. I don’t think I’ve mentioned this on the blog, but I had an idea recently that in order to grow and develop my confidence, I would like to teach English in China, and move there for at least one year. I’m unable to do it right now because I still want to save up more money as a back-up plan, but to see somebody who was several years younger than me, already flourishing that position meant that I felt quite disappointed with myself.

Fortunately, I’ve experienced this before and have developed ways to overcome it, and so those feelings only lasted for around 30 minutes. I told myself that although my progress in this way is below hers, we’re different people, on different paths. Plus, I have a plan, and although I’ve never been blessed financially, with hard work I will achieve this goal eventually. I guess what I’m trying to get across is that I’m able to step back now and regard the intention to move forward as more important than the past, as that’s all that I can control.

Stay safe ~

Sean

Envy (Verse, Half Chorus, Verse, Chorus, Bridge, Chorus)

Such a difficult feeling
scrolling through social media
she’s already achieved my goal
despite being years younger

Envy is a killer
my positivity torn asunder
mind frantically begins to search
through all of my blunders

Thirty minutes or so after
I’ve had time to reflect
considered my values
began to calmly introspect

 
Envy is a killer
my positivity torn asunder
mind frantically begins to search
through all of my blunders
But I take a breath and tell myself
we’re just on different paths
wherever mine takes me
I’ll make sure it’s built to last

 
With every single feeling
you always have a choice
to triumph or despair
give in to either voice
I chose a little of both
tried to make envy my friend
because motivation in the present
is what matters in the end

Envy is a killer
my positivity torn asunder
mind frantically begins to search
through all of my blunders
But I take a breath and tell myself
we’re just on different paths
wherever mine takes me
I’ll make sure it’s built to last

Lyrics Day Eighty Seven – ‘Chocolate Bars’

Hey everyone,

today’s lyrics speak about another small but extremely comforting memory that I have. I guess what I’ve taken from writing this one, and indeed some of the others, is once again the amazing impact of perspective. Dad coming home and buying us chocolate bars, in his eyes, was probably a very simple thing to do, but it meant the world to us. In relation to that, I can also see the impact of seemingly small gestures, too.

Stay safe ~

Sean

Chocolate Bars (Verse, Half Chorus, Verse, Chorus, Bridge, Chorus)

Dad would always bring us chocolate
when he arrived home late from bingo
I used to get so excited
watching him pull up from the window

 
Knowing what I do now
I wonder about your excursions
you were so late sometimes
always taking diversions

 
You pulled out of your pocket
four bars of different variety
held them in your hand
as we approached happily

 
Knowing what I do now
I wonder about your excursions
you were so late sometimes
always taking diversions
it makes me sad to think about
but I won’t ruin a good memory
I’ll just remember the chocolate
and what you meant to me

 
It just goes to show
simple actions can be profound
if performed with good will
love and meaning abound
It was just a small thing
but you did it with love
I’ll treasure those moments
try to forget the other stuff

 
Knowing what I do now
I wonder about your excursions
you were so late sometimes
always taking diversions
it makes me sad to think about
but I won’t ruin a good memory
I’ll just remember the chocolate
and what you meant to me

Lyrics Day Eighty Six – ‘Little House’

Hey everyone,

do you have somewhere you go currently, or a nostalgic place in your memory, which just seemed perfect? For me, it was my friends house, since we were kids. Reading through these lyrics that I wrote, some of the descriptions feel a little disrespectful, but it was the clutter which made the house feel homely, like something out of a story book. Even in writing these lyrics, I’m still able to remember the exact smell from that time, which was a pleasant surprise.

Stay safe ~

Sean

Little House (Verse, Half Chorus, Verse, Chorus, Bridge, Chorus)

Your home wasn’t little
but it felt so small
with clutter all around
dust lining the walls

Now I often wonder
if the memory of that sight
that comfortable feeling
is why I love the warm light

But in that lack of space
I only felt comfort
a strong sense of warmth
like something out of ‘The Hobbit’

Now I often wonder
if the memory of that sight
that comfortable feeling
is why I love the warm light
and that pungent smell
I associated with you
cat fur and pipe smoke
filled the house through and through

 
Looking back on it now
recall my admiration so clearly
saw your home as magical
a peaceful sanctuary
Your Dad reading a book
Brother watching Buffy
from ages five to twenty seven
it was always you and me

 
Now I often wonder
if the memory of that sight
that comfortable feeling
is why I love the warm light
and that pungent smell
I associated with you
cat fur and pipe smoke
filled the house through and through

 

Lyrics Day Eighty Five – ‘Hot Chocolate’

Hey everyone,

today’s lyrics are written about another nice memory I have, during a primary school football match. For the last 5-10 minutes, the rain was torrential – to this day I have no idea why Mr Bevan (our teacher and football coach) kept us out there! I could barely feel my hands, and with all the rain, it was so hard to see clearly, but when Mum picked me up, and we were able to return home, she ensured that I felt comfortable straight away.

It’s a warm and comfortable memory, and I can still recall the feelings that I had, at that time. Though, looking back, I appreciate it a lot more now. I have no issues at all with my Mum – actually, she’s the kindest person that I know, but we’ve just drifted apart over time. In writing some of these memories associated with childhood, that longing for a family presence is certainly with me.

Stay safe ~

Sean

Hot Chocolate (Verse, Half Chorus, Verse, Chorus, Bridge, Chorus)

As we ran around the field
The sky turned dull and gloomy
heavens announced themselves
rain poured down heavily

My kit was soaked through
and I could barely see
Mum waiting at the final whistle
weather didn’t affect me, suddenly

 
The conditions were brutal
colds were ours to catch
so hard to believe
it was just a school football match

 
My kit was soaked through
and I could barely see
Mum waiting at the final whistle
weather didn’t affect me, suddenly
arrived home quickly
no longer in the mire
hot chocolate placed in my hands
wrapped in a towel by the fire

I guess what I’m trying to do
is reflect on what I’ve lost
could make 100 hot chocolates
right now, if I want
but it’s never the same
if not received with love
the memories are symbolic
of who I want to become

My kit was soaked through
and I could barely see
Mum waiting at the final whistle
weather didn’t affect me, suddenly
arrived home quickly
no longer in the mire
hot chocolate placed in my hands
wrapped in a towel by the fire

 

Lyrics Day Eighty Four – ‘Toy Santa’

Hey everyone,

today’s lyrics were written about another warm memory I have, from when I was around 7 or 8 years old. It was the last day of primary school before the two week Christmas break, and my Dad picked me up before taking me to the village shop, to buy a little toy Santa car that I’d wanted for a while. Even as an adult, I love travelling home from work before a weekend or a holiday, and I had the same feeling then. It was so dark, even in the afternoon, but I remember the glow of that small village shop, sort of a manifestation of my own feelings. It’s a great memory 🙂

Stay Safe ~

Sean

Toy Santa (Verse, Half Chorus, Verse, Chorus, Bridge, Chorus)

I recall my feeling
that cold winter afternoon
the old village shop
came glowing into view

Village was cloaked in darkness
even after school at 15:20
but the hopeful promise of Christmas
warmed my cold hands plenty

All of the other kids
had bought it weeks ago
Santa driving a car
pull back and watch him go

Village was cloaked in darkness
even after school at 15:20
but the hopeful promise of Christmas
warmed my cold hands plenty
Dad had offered to buy me
that little Santa toy
beginning of the holidays
my heart bursting with joy

 
That last day at school
before the Christmas break
it was so dark and cold
but I didn’t once shake
all I can remember
is that special feeling
visiting the shop
more than appealing

Village was cloaked in darkness
even after school at 15:20
but the hopeful promise of Christmas
warmed my cold hands plenty
Dad had offered to buy me
that little Santa toy
beginning of the holidays
my heart bursting with joy

Lyrics Day Eighty Three – ‘Friday Night Football’

Hey everyone,

today’s lyrics reflect on another special memory that I have, or rather, a special period of time in my life. During my time at 6th form, over a two year period, my friends and I would play football together every Friday evening. It sounds quite simple on the face of it, but it was a meaningful time for me, in the sense that my friends and I were growing up together, and at the end of each week, we had this game to look forward to. I really loved it, and I hope that it allows you to reflect on your own poignant memories 🙂

Stay safe ~

Sean

 

Friday Night Football (Verse, Half Chorus, Verse, Chorus, Bridge, Chorus)

The sun was always setting
on those cool Friday nights
our weekly gathering
a special time in my life

I remember in the mornings
I always asked each friend
checked with every single one
that we’d be playing again

Sixth form building towering
over our own field of dreams
as time passed by
I’ve realised just what it means

I remember in the mornings
I always asked each friend
checked with every single one
that we’d be playing again
Lining up each Friday
deciding on the game
friends standing together
a perfect state of play

One time it was raining
everybody went home
I felt so frustrated
and played all alone
but after a few minutes
you came to join me
I guess without football
it didn’t feel like Friday

I remember in the mornings
I always asked each friend
checked with every single one
that we’d be playing again
Lining up each Friday
deciding on the game
friends standing together
a perfect state of play

Lyrics Day Seventy Nine – ‘Dial-a-Roast’

Hey everyone,

I’ve been thinking back on some good memories recently, and will probably write about some specific experiences over the next few days, or at least, my feelings about them. To give some context to the random sounding title this time, a few years ago, before university, my friends and I would go out together for a meal, once every month. I think it was actually the very first time we went out together, but Stuart randomly came up with an idea for takeaway roast dinners. The idea itself isn’t bad, but we had a lot of fun going over different scenarios and even filmed a mock advert for it!

In relation to that, and in writing these lyrics, I’ve loved looking back on that particular time. I’ve spoken a little about mindfulness, and perception of time, but I find that the easiest way to be caught in a single moment is just to be happy, as I was during these memories 🙂

Stay safe, and happy ~

Sean

‘Dial-a-Roast’ (Verse, Half Chorus, Verse, Chorus, Bridge, Chorus)

I felt so contented
the six of us together
hysterical over your idea
memories I’ll hold forever

 
Allow me to step back
just for a second
to a moment in time
where momentous joy beckoned

 
Was your idea worthwhile?
Yes – it left a residue
something we’ll all remember
priceless times, high in value

 
Allow me to step back
just for a second
to a moment in time
where momentous joy beckoned
No thoughts of future or past
only friends around a table
sharing in the laughter
which would become a staple

Talked about it for weeks
and even filmed an advert
when I fluffed my lines
laughed till our stomachs hurt
To you guys, to those times
I’d like to raise a roast
always remember what you said
‘It’s not HARD to cook a roast!’

 
Allow me to step back
just for a second
to a moment in time
where momentous joy beckoned
No thoughts of future or past
only friends around a table
sharing in the laughter
which would become a staple

Lyrics Day Seventy Two – ‘Asleep’

Hey everyone,

today’s lyrics were inspired by some random scrolling on social media, where I came across a photo of an old friend – I’ve known him since primary school. I think his wife had taken the photo, and he was sleeping, apparently exhausted from his fatherly duties. To be honest, apart from one of two cases, this same situation is happening for most people I went to school with, and I’m still hoping that my dream girl messages me back, which made me smile (if a little ironically)!

Still, the photo made me wonder if that situation would ever happen for me, and that’s what these words are about.

Stay safe ~

Sean

 

Asleep (Verse, Half Chorus, Verse, Chorus, Bridge, Chorus)

Browsing through online photos
one of my old friends
saw an image of him sleeping
family life paying dividends

A life so contented
or that’s how it seemed
surrounded by loved ones
smiling while falling asleep

 
His wife had praised him
for being a great Dad
he seemed so peaceful
part of me wishes I had

A life so contented
or that’s how it seemed
surrounded by loved ones
smiling while falling asleep
It must be a nice feeling
to have your own family
but I’m just not ready
there’s no-one here to wake me

So many classmates
are in the same situation
married with children
way above my station
I’m just sat here waiting
on that green light
can’t help but smile
I was always a little behind

 
A life so contented
or that’s how it seemed
surrounded by loved ones
smiling while falling asleep
It must be a nice feeling
to have your own family
but I’m just not ready
there’s no-one here to wake me

Lyrics Day Sixty Nine – ‘Notice’

Hey everyone,

last night I was speaking to one of my best friends via message, for the first time in over a week. She told me she’d been feeling bad for most of that time, and that’s why she hadn’t messaged me, but then I thought: ‘Why didn’t I message?’

Fair enough, with some friends, you have lower standards, where you’ll just speak once a month or so, but with this person, I shouldn’t have left it so long. That perhaps sounds a little bit dramatic, but it’s a standard that I always wanted to live by. I know what it feels like to be alone, and I never want anybody else to feel that way.

When you read today’s lyrics, you may think they’re a little negative and overly-critical, but these words, and all of the others that I’ve written so far, are helping to consider different topics and feelings more deeply, and because of that, I’m able to know myself better. In fact, I’ve started a project where I’m analysing the different aspects of my life that I’d like to improve, in separate documents. So for example, I’ve been working on understanding my identity further for some time, writing a document gathering my thoughts, but I’ve also created a folder (on my computer) collecting style ideas, as that’s another thing I’d like to improve on when this lock down is over. It may sound a little too rigid to deal with emotional and philosophical issues, but it helps me to organise my thoughts – to write down the things I’d like to improve, and see them there in front of me, in black and white. I want to treat it as a checklist.

As another example, I’ve decided to create a folder concerning my physical health and fitness. In that folder initially will be a document writing down what things I feel are wrong with me (running style, calf muscles etc), and that I could improve on, and then I’ll do some research and create some documents which will help me to find the answers. I’ve gone a little off track, but I just wanted to explain where thinking deeper about the feelings I have has led me – thanks for continuing to read this!

Stay safe ~

Sean

 

Notice (Verse, Half Chorus, Verse, Chorus, Bridge, Chorus)

My friend yesterday she told me
she’d been in a bad mood all week
I’m sorry that I never asked
during that time, we didn’t even speak

 
There are so many souls
out adrift in the sea
searching for an anchor
someone to hear their plea

It’s easy to say we’re busy
to turn away and feign ignorance
but I didn’t want to be that person
I wanted to make a difference

There are so many souls
out adrift in the sea
searching for an anchor
someone to hear their plea
as they drift in the cold abyss
have somebody to float with
but right now that’s not me
I didn’t even notice

Say I shouldn’t blame myself
but that’s just an excuse
it’s easy to send a message
instead of being a recluse
I need to do better
in every single aspect
work harder every second
and earn some self-respect

 
There are so many souls
out adrift in the sea
searching for an anchor
someone to hear their plea
as they drift in the cold abyss
have somebody to float with
but right now that’s not me
I didn’t even notice