Lyrics Day Ninety One – ‘Snowball’

Hey everyone,

today’s lyrics share my experience of motivation, or I should say the key to motivation. I always put a lot of pressure on myself to be productive each day, but of course there are times when I feel a lack of motivation, and over time, with reading and life experience, I’ve realised that in order to be motivated, the first step is literally to stand, and do anything. In the lyrics, I speak about doing the washing up and how that helped me, but it can be anything. Then, the framework of your mind somehow changes – your posture, your intention, your movement, they all play a part and help motivation to grow, just from a small start.  As I read, ‘the key to motivation is motivation.’

The reason the lyrics are named ‘snowball’ is because it’s similar to that effect – initially, you have a very small flake of snow, but over time, more snow accumulates and the snowball is created – it gets larger and larger.

(I’ve had a very long day and I’m not sure I explained that properly, so if you have any questions, please feel free to comment!)

Stay safe ~

Sean

Snowball (Verse, Half Chorus, Verse, Chorus, Bridge, Chorus)

Feeling tired and lethargic
not an ounce of inclination
realised the ‘snowball effect’
was intrinsic to motivation

The first step is standing
it all begins with action
the intention to move
instigates a reaction

Started by doing something
decided on the washing up
as the bubbles worked their magic
I began to leave my ruck

 
The first step is standing
it all begins with action
the intention to move
instigates a reaction
That’s why even small tasks
can aid progress overall
because little by little
motivation begins to snowball

I realised then it didn’t matter
exactly what I did
as long as I didn’t remain
sincere, but somehow glib
with those gradual steps
I regained a sense of peace
my snowball became larger
piece by fluffy piece

The first step is standing
it all begins with action
the intention to move
instigates a reaction
That’s why even small tasks
can aid progress overall
because little by little
motivation begins to snowball

Lyrics Day Ninety – ‘Envy’

Hey everyone,

today’s lyrics concern the feeling of envy I experienced yesterday. I was just having some cereal on my day off, and scrolling through my phone, where I came across a photo of a girl I used to volunteer with, who is currently teaching in Korea. I don’t think I’ve mentioned this on the blog, but I had an idea recently that in order to grow and develop my confidence, I would like to teach English in China, and move there for at least one year. I’m unable to do it right now because I still want to save up more money as a back-up plan, but to see somebody who was several years younger than me, already flourishing that position meant that I felt quite disappointed with myself.

Fortunately, I’ve experienced this before and have developed ways to overcome it, and so those feelings only lasted for around 30 minutes. I told myself that although my progress in this way is below hers, we’re different people, on different paths. Plus, I have a plan, and although I’ve never been blessed financially, with hard work I will achieve this goal eventually. I guess what I’m trying to get across is that I’m able to step back now and regard the intention to move forward as more important than the past, as that’s all that I can control.

Stay safe ~

Sean

Envy (Verse, Half Chorus, Verse, Chorus, Bridge, Chorus)

Such a difficult feeling
scrolling through social media
she’s already achieved my goal
despite being years younger

Envy is a killer
my positivity torn asunder
mind frantically begins to search
through all of my blunders

Thirty minutes or so after
I’ve had time to reflect
considered my values
began to calmly introspect

 
Envy is a killer
my positivity torn asunder
mind frantically begins to search
through all of my blunders
But I take a breath and tell myself
we’re just on different paths
wherever mine takes me
I’ll make sure it’s built to last

 
With every single feeling
you always have a choice
to triumph or despair
give in to either voice
I chose a little of both
tried to make envy my friend
because motivation in the present
is what matters in the end

Envy is a killer
my positivity torn asunder
mind frantically begins to search
through all of my blunders
But I take a breath and tell myself
we’re just on different paths
wherever mine takes me
I’ll make sure it’s built to last

Lyrics Day Eighty Nine – ‘Standing Down’

Hey everyone,

today’s lyrics are written about the feelings associated with looking at the ground, avoiding difficult situations and standing down. I’ve had problems with this over my whole life, but particularly in my adult years. It felt easier to turn away or ignore difficult situations, but those actions have cost me, and now even small things can feel difficult. But, on the bright side, I have realised this over time, and have written down challenges to overcome, step by step, as this seems like the only way to combat the feeling. It’s just another step in my development, and hopefully I can document my progress with a different set of lyrics someday.

Stay well ~

Sean

Standing Down (Verse, Half Chorus, Verse, Chorus, Bridge, Chorus)

Sat today with my colleagues
for the purpose of training
but the thought of speaking up
wasn’t anything but draining

Waiting for the day
when I refuse to stand down
meet them dead in the eyes
instead of looking around

Some friends called out to me
as I stepped inside
managed to keep my head up
felt a small sense of pride

Waiting for the day
when I refuse to stand down
meet them dead in the eyes
instead of looking around
Rarely taken seriously
shy and timid Sean
progress arrives in steps
beginning of a new dawn

I know I can do it
I’ve seen the signs
that my fear wasn’t real
only in the mind
Next time it knocks
and tells me to turn
I’ll stand my ground
the truth I’ll discern

 
Waiting for the day
when I refuse to stand down
meet them dead in the eyes
instead of looking around
Rarely taken seriously
shy and timid Sean
progress arrives in steps
beginning of a new dawn

Lyrics Day Eighty Eight – ‘Smoothie and Biscuits’

Hey everyone,

today’s lyrics present yet another small, sentimental feeling/memory which I recall fondly. When I was younger, I had a part-time job, and on the eve of my two days off, when I got off the train, before biking home I would stop off at Sainsbury’s to get a smoothie and some chocolate biscuits, ready to enjoy later whilst playing a video game. I actually kept up this tradition for some time, which my colleagues would often make fun of! In any case, though small, it was a really nice feeling for me each time, and I can look back on that time with a warm heart.

As a side note, last week, my friends and I recorded the first in what I hope will be many episodes of ‘Coffee Table Musings’, a podcast. I’ve been considering ways in which I can use my time at home more effectively, and a podcast is perfect – it can all be done online and enables me to spend time with my friends, during this difficult period of time. The first episode speaks about the dreams/nightmares that my friends and I have had, and we offer up our interpretations of those. I love to explore different topics, but what’s most fascinating to me are people’s perspectives, and the reasons why they feel that way. I hope that the podcast can give me a chance to learn and grow, and live in a better way.

I’m not sure how regularly the podcasts will be recorded, because it depends on the availability of my friends, but I have a lot of ideas, and will do them as often as I’m able to 🙂

Stay safe ~

Sean

 

Smoothie and Biscuits (Verse, Half Chorus, Verse, Chorus, Bridge, Chorus)

Biked home on Friday afternoon
stopped off at Sainsbury’s
not a care in the world
just biscuits and a smoothie

Always stayed up late
weekend ahead of me
playing video games
life repeating endlessly

The endless repetition
never seemed a waste of time
I hadn’t accomplished much
but each second was mine

Always stayed up late
weekend ahead of me
playing video games
life repeating endlessly
never considered tomorrow
but I didn’t mind
with my snacks beside me
I was more than satisfied

Somewhere in writing this
I’m searching for a balance
between a meaningful life
and comfortable moments
As the years passed
snacks seemed a waste
felt guilty about gaming
tomorrow was making haste

 
Always stayed up late
weekend ahead of me
playing video games
life repeating endlessly
never considered tomorrow
but I didn’t mind
with my snacks beside me
I was more than satisfied

Lyrics Day Eighty Seven – ‘Chocolate Bars’

Hey everyone,

today’s lyrics speak about another small but extremely comforting memory that I have. I guess what I’ve taken from writing this one, and indeed some of the others, is once again the amazing impact of perspective. Dad coming home and buying us chocolate bars, in his eyes, was probably a very simple thing to do, but it meant the world to us. In relation to that, I can also see the impact of seemingly small gestures, too.

Stay safe ~

Sean

Chocolate Bars (Verse, Half Chorus, Verse, Chorus, Bridge, Chorus)

Dad would always bring us chocolate
when he arrived home late from bingo
I used to get so excited
watching him pull up from the window

 
Knowing what I do now
I wonder about your excursions
you were so late sometimes
always taking diversions

 
You pulled out of your pocket
four bars of different variety
held them in your hand
as we approached happily

 
Knowing what I do now
I wonder about your excursions
you were so late sometimes
always taking diversions
it makes me sad to think about
but I won’t ruin a good memory
I’ll just remember the chocolate
and what you meant to me

 
It just goes to show
simple actions can be profound
if performed with good will
love and meaning abound
It was just a small thing
but you did it with love
I’ll treasure those moments
try to forget the other stuff

 
Knowing what I do now
I wonder about your excursions
you were so late sometimes
always taking diversions
it makes me sad to think about
but I won’t ruin a good memory
I’ll just remember the chocolate
and what you meant to me

Lyrics Day Eighty Six – ‘Little House’

Hey everyone,

do you have somewhere you go currently, or a nostalgic place in your memory, which just seemed perfect? For me, it was my friends house, since we were kids. Reading through these lyrics that I wrote, some of the descriptions feel a little disrespectful, but it was the clutter which made the house feel homely, like something out of a story book. Even in writing these lyrics, I’m still able to remember the exact smell from that time, which was a pleasant surprise.

Stay safe ~

Sean

Little House (Verse, Half Chorus, Verse, Chorus, Bridge, Chorus)

Your home wasn’t little
but it felt so small
with clutter all around
dust lining the walls

Now I often wonder
if the memory of that sight
that comfortable feeling
is why I love the warm light

But in that lack of space
I only felt comfort
a strong sense of warmth
like something out of ‘The Hobbit’

Now I often wonder
if the memory of that sight
that comfortable feeling
is why I love the warm light
and that pungent smell
I associated with you
cat fur and pipe smoke
filled the house through and through

 
Looking back on it now
recall my admiration so clearly
saw your home as magical
a peaceful sanctuary
Your Dad reading a book
Brother watching Buffy
from ages five to twenty seven
it was always you and me

 
Now I often wonder
if the memory of that sight
that comfortable feeling
is why I love the warm light
and that pungent smell
I associated with you
cat fur and pipe smoke
filled the house through and through

 

Lyrics Day Eighty Five – ‘Hot Chocolate’

Hey everyone,

today’s lyrics are written about another nice memory I have, during a primary school football match. For the last 5-10 minutes, the rain was torrential – to this day I have no idea why Mr Bevan (our teacher and football coach) kept us out there! I could barely feel my hands, and with all the rain, it was so hard to see clearly, but when Mum picked me up, and we were able to return home, she ensured that I felt comfortable straight away.

It’s a warm and comfortable memory, and I can still recall the feelings that I had, at that time. Though, looking back, I appreciate it a lot more now. I have no issues at all with my Mum – actually, she’s the kindest person that I know, but we’ve just drifted apart over time. In writing some of these memories associated with childhood, that longing for a family presence is certainly with me.

Stay safe ~

Sean

Hot Chocolate (Verse, Half Chorus, Verse, Chorus, Bridge, Chorus)

As we ran around the field
The sky turned dull and gloomy
heavens announced themselves
rain poured down heavily

My kit was soaked through
and I could barely see
Mum waiting at the final whistle
weather didn’t affect me, suddenly

 
The conditions were brutal
colds were ours to catch
so hard to believe
it was just a school football match

 
My kit was soaked through
and I could barely see
Mum waiting at the final whistle
weather didn’t affect me, suddenly
arrived home quickly
no longer in the mire
hot chocolate placed in my hands
wrapped in a towel by the fire

I guess what I’m trying to do
is reflect on what I’ve lost
could make 100 hot chocolates
right now, if I want
but it’s never the same
if not received with love
the memories are symbolic
of who I want to become

My kit was soaked through
and I could barely see
Mum waiting at the final whistle
weather didn’t affect me, suddenly
arrived home quickly
no longer in the mire
hot chocolate placed in my hands
wrapped in a towel by the fire

 

Lyrics Day Eighty Four – ‘Toy Santa’

Hey everyone,

today’s lyrics were written about another warm memory I have, from when I was around 7 or 8 years old. It was the last day of primary school before the two week Christmas break, and my Dad picked me up before taking me to the village shop, to buy a little toy Santa car that I’d wanted for a while. Even as an adult, I love travelling home from work before a weekend or a holiday, and I had the same feeling then. It was so dark, even in the afternoon, but I remember the glow of that small village shop, sort of a manifestation of my own feelings. It’s a great memory 🙂

Stay Safe ~

Sean

Toy Santa (Verse, Half Chorus, Verse, Chorus, Bridge, Chorus)

I recall my feeling
that cold winter afternoon
the old village shop
came glowing into view

Village was cloaked in darkness
even after school at 15:20
but the hopeful promise of Christmas
warmed my cold hands plenty

All of the other kids
had bought it weeks ago
Santa driving a car
pull back and watch him go

Village was cloaked in darkness
even after school at 15:20
but the hopeful promise of Christmas
warmed my cold hands plenty
Dad had offered to buy me
that little Santa toy
beginning of the holidays
my heart bursting with joy

 
That last day at school
before the Christmas break
it was so dark and cold
but I didn’t once shake
all I can remember
is that special feeling
visiting the shop
more than appealing

Village was cloaked in darkness
even after school at 15:20
but the hopeful promise of Christmas
warmed my cold hands plenty
Dad had offered to buy me
that little Santa toy
beginning of the holidays
my heart bursting with joy

Lyrics Day Eighty Three – ‘Friday Night Football’

Hey everyone,

today’s lyrics reflect on another special memory that I have, or rather, a special period of time in my life. During my time at 6th form, over a two year period, my friends and I would play football together every Friday evening. It sounds quite simple on the face of it, but it was a meaningful time for me, in the sense that my friends and I were growing up together, and at the end of each week, we had this game to look forward to. I really loved it, and I hope that it allows you to reflect on your own poignant memories 🙂

Stay safe ~

Sean

 

Friday Night Football (Verse, Half Chorus, Verse, Chorus, Bridge, Chorus)

The sun was always setting
on those cool Friday nights
our weekly gathering
a special time in my life

I remember in the mornings
I always asked each friend
checked with every single one
that we’d be playing again

Sixth form building towering
over our own field of dreams
as time passed by
I’ve realised just what it means

I remember in the mornings
I always asked each friend
checked with every single one
that we’d be playing again
Lining up each Friday
deciding on the game
friends standing together
a perfect state of play

One time it was raining
everybody went home
I felt so frustrated
and played all alone
but after a few minutes
you came to join me
I guess without football
it didn’t feel like Friday

I remember in the mornings
I always asked each friend
checked with every single one
that we’d be playing again
Lining up each Friday
deciding on the game
friends standing together
a perfect state of play

Lyrics Day Eighty Two – ‘One Person’

Hey everyone,

today’s lyrics are about a struggle I’ve had for some time. Perhaps struggle is too serious a word, but certainly a psychological conundrum. I always wanted to help a lot of people and enact great change, and certainly during this time, when I’ve been unable to complete my regular volunteer duties, I’ve analysed my progress and found myself to be lacking. But, this didn’t just happen during this period of time, but for the last ten years, at least. Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy to help somebody, but I always feel like it isn’t enough; like, there’s a higher mountain to climb in order to truly make my life count.

As a positive, it does mean that I’m always looking for new ways to support people in new ways, but it’s mostly a negative, because I never feel a lasting satisfaction from doing that, despite it being my life’s mission. I think it’s often because I imagine the top of the summit, the moment where the lives of thousands of people are saved, or improved, and everything else seems to pale in comparison to that ultimate goal.

These thoughts have been more prominent recently, and so I forced myself to consider it, whilst I was at work today. And I suddenly thought, ‘if helping one person isn’t worthwhile, then by that logic, helping a million is irrelevant, too.’

So, by the same token, I can say, because helping a million people is relevant, then one is, too.

I’ve been so caught up in my ultimate goal that I’ve actually declined invitations to volunteer events in the past, thinking ‘that won’t many help many people, so what’s the point?’ But, I was missing the point. It’s true that I want to change the lives of a lot of people for the better, as many as possible, in my life. But it’s the intention behind those acts that matters, and every single person is important in that journey. Whether I go on to help one more or a million more, my intention in living, and in those actions will be the same, and that’s what counts.

Stay safe, and thoughtful ~

Sean

One Person (Verse, Half Chorus, Verse, Chorus, Bridge, Chorus)

Had an epiphany today
perhaps I’ve finally solved
the mystery of my mind
why I never give applause

Continuously focused
on radical achievements
never stopped to focus
on what a single one meant

Whoever I helped
it was never enough
wanted the save the world
and I only saved one

Continuously focused
on radical achievements
never stopped to focus
on what a single one meant
Save one person or many?
Their value is the same
your intention is what matters
to support without delay

 
Made the mistake of thinking
my intentions were trivial
actions a drop in the ocean
unseen and inconsequential
Actually they mean everything
and that’s because
if one person isn’t worthwhile
then nobody is

 
Continuously focused
on radical achievements
never stopped to focus
on what a single one meant
To save one or many?
Their value is the same
your intention is what matters
to support without delay